Talk therapy is a helpful and effective treatment for most emotional and mental health-related issues. However, talk therapy doesn’t work as a one-size-fits-all approach. Good results depend heavily on an individualized treatment plan and a strong therapeutic rapport, which is the relationship between you and the therapist.
Finding the right therapist can be challenging. You will have to consider the combination of experience, approach, counseling style, and price point that works best for you. If you’re wondering, “How do I choose a therapist?” the tips below are a great starting point.
1. Decide what you want to work on
If you’re like most people, you are probably seeking a therapist to help you with a problem. However, therapists specialize in specific areas of mental health and wellness.
To connect with a professional that deeply understands your problem, you need a clear idea of what you want to focus on. But this can be tricky because symptoms can have different underlying causes. However, you can still kick-start this process by looking at common reasons people start therapy. See if any of these statements resonate with you:
Symptom management:
Circumstantial reasons:
Ongoing issues:
Note that many of these issues are interrelated. For example, people who have gone through a traumatic experience are more likely to develop Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) symptoms if they have experienced adversities early in life [1].
2. Consider your preferences
Therapy is a commitment. To set yourself up for success, consider your strengths and what you are willing to do. Then, try to ensure these align with the therapy used by the therapist you are considering.
For example, are you willing to spend time between sessions working on assignments? If so, you may benefit from Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT). CBT or solution-focused therapies are also ideal if you are looking for short-term, present-focused treatment.
If you want to process past events and learn healthier emotional coping skills, schema or psychoanalytic therapy may be a better fit for you.
You should also consider the type of counseling environment that may work best for you. For example, do you want to travel to your therapist’s office for each session or have the option to meet virtually or over the phone?
You can also choose between individual or group sessions, which each have advantages. Individual therapy is private, flexible, and personalized. Group therapy is more affordable, offers a sense of connection and community, and can help combat common side effects of mental health issues, such as loneliness and isolation.
3. Use a therapist directory
Once you have an idea of your therapy goals and the approach that may work best for you, you can start looking for a therapist. There are many online therapist directories that list professionals by location and specialty. You can also filter by other qualities that may be important to you, such as:
If you have health insurance, your provider should have a searchable directory of mental health professionals that can accept your plan. You can also look for a therapist on these reputable websites:
Even if directory listings are vetted, it is important to be able to interpret a therapist’s credentials and qualifications. In the US, the European Union, and Australia, “psychologist” is a protected title.
This means that only licensed and qualified professionals can present themselves as psychologists. However, the titles “counselor” or “coach” don’t have the same rigorous standards. This may not be a problem, but counselors and coaches may not be qualified to treat individuals with mental or behavioral health issues.
No matter the title, you should seek care from mental health professionals with at least a master’s degree. If you do not understand a therapist’s credentials, don’t be afraid to ask.
4. Schedule an introductory appointment
A therapist who seems like the perfect fit on paper may not work out in reality. For this reason, many mental health professionals offer free introductory appointments where potential clients can get a sense of what it would be like to work together.
Use this time to get to know the therapist and learn more about their background, experience, and approach. You shouldn’t feel pressured into making any commitments at this stage.
5. Talk about your expectations and goals
During the initial session, you should summarize what you are looking for and the progress you hope to make through therapy.
The therapist will explain their typical process and how they help patients reach their goals. They may ask questions about your personal and medical history, such as if you’ve been diagnosed with a mental health condition or if you are taking medication. Only share as much as you’re comfortable with.
The initial session is also a time to discuss practical concerns, such as:
You can use this information, plus your interaction, to determine your next step.
While it is possible to mesh well with the first therapist you meet, this doesn’t always happen. Therefore, you may need to attend several initial consultations before you find the right match.
6. Assess your feelings
Working with a therapist can surface uncomfortable and challenging emotions. It is essential that you feel safe and that your therapist inspires trust and confidence. After the initial session, take notes about your physical and emotional reactions.
These questions can help you assess the interaction:
| Question | Why this is important |
|---|---|
| Did you feel heard/understood? | Effective therapists are skilled listeners. So watch out for therapists who interrupt, seem distracted, or invalidate your feelings. |
| Did the interaction feel psychologically safe? | Psychological safety refers to feeling included, respected, and not judged. To build a therapeutic rapport, you must feel you can bring all aspects of yourself into the session. If you felt uncomfortable during the consultation, the therapist is most likely a poor match. While some discomfort is part of therapy, it shouldn’t arise from things like criticism from the therapist. |
| Can you imagine yourself making progress with their approach? | Some common reasons for patient-therapist mismatch are discrepancies in expectations [2]. Therefore, it is important that you and the therapist agree on treatment timelines. |
| Does the therapist’s background and experience match your needs and treatment goals? | Even the most welcoming and accepting therapist may not be the right fit if they do not have adequate experience with your issue. Therapy is a highly specialized field, and qualifications in one area do not necessarily transfer to others. For example, therapists generally need additional qualifications to help clients with trauma or addiction. |
Choosing the right therapist is the first step in the long journey toward healing and mental wellness. It is also a way to practice important skills, such as knowing and upholding your boundaries, attuning to your emotions, and exercising your autonomy. In this way, finding a therapist can help prepare you to get the most out of your treatment.
[1] McLaughlin, K. A., Koenen, K. C., Bromet, E. J., Karam, E. G., Liu, H., Petukhova, M., Ruscio, A. M., Sampson, N. A., Stein, D. J., Aguilar-Gaxiola, S., Alonso, J., Borges, G., Demyttenaere, K., Dinolova, R. V., Ferry, F., Florescu, S., Gureje, O., Kawakami, N., Lee, S., . . . Kessler, R. C. (2017). Childhood adversities and post-traumatic stress disorder: Evidence for stress sensitisation in the World Mental Health Surveys. The British Journal of Psychiatry, 211(5), 280-288. https://doi.org/10.1192/bjp.bp.116.197640
[2] De Nadai, Alessandro & King, Morgan & Karver, Marc & Storch, Eric. (2014). Addressing Patient Motivation, Therapeutic Alliance, and Treatment Expectancies in Interventions for Anxiety Disorders. 10.1002/9781118775349.ch56.
